DARA THUH EXPLORA ENTR THUH SIKKNESS
by iammi
Summary: More of DARA. I know I said it waz a one shot but mi friend liked it so DARA is back. It's just for fun and nothing meant so enjoy:


DARA THUH EXPLORA

DARA'Z WORLD

ENTER THUH SIKKNESS

Hey there. Sorry for the delay. I know I said Dara wuld b a one shot but mi friend likd Dara so Darz bakk again. Dara iz stil just 4 fun n nothing meant so enjoyJ

{ two young girls dressed in solid jet black wearing Official Zombie Dara t-shirts with pentagrams tattooed on their foreheads grin as they stand n opposite sides of a big sign that shows a cross and the words believe in him above the cross. The girls on the right points to 666 on her sleeve while the girl on the left points to a holographic Dara pentagram on her sleeve and they grin as they flash horns above their heads.)

Right girl - Dara is her name and the girl's comin

Left girl - Straight Outta Hell!

{DARA bursts through the sign with Kaila at her side grin and laughs as they dance through a forest.}

Da da da da Dara! Da da da Dara! Da da da da Dara! Da da da Dara! Dara Dara Dara Dara Thuh Explora! Who es super - cool as a zombie Explora Dara! Kill your enimes! Eat their flesh! We will show you how! Da da Dara! Da da Dara! Christ no preaching! Christ no preaching! Oh no! Dara Thuh Explora!

Dara - Hola amigos. I'm Dara and this is my friend Kaila. She's from China and she can say lots of cool things in Chinese.

Kaila - Ni hao! Jiaoshi shi mugou! {Dara laughs as she high fives Kaila and they flip off the schoolhouse in the background.}

Dara - Kaila just said teachers are bitches .Cogida de la escula! That's fuck school in Spanish. {Kaila laughs as she high fives Dara back before she throws a rock through the schoolhouse window and laughs even harder as Dara pelts the teacher who runs out with a water balloon.}

Kaila - Fuck you Miss Miller! {The pair laughs as they throw more water balloons at Miss Miller who cries as she runs back inside.} Kaila - What was in those balloons … you don't wanna know. School is just a place where you waste your life anyway.

Dara - Speaking of life you can probably tell that I'm a zombie.

You - What's a zombie?

Dara - a zombie is the spirit of a dead person that comes back yet they inhabit their own body. I even have demonic powers.

You - Cool! How do I become a zombie?

Dara - You can become a zombie by dieing after you dedicate your soul to Father Satan. Father Satan loves us all and I'll show you how to dedicate on a later epi. I dedicated mi soul to Father Satan and Daddy let me become a zombie after I died from my injuries. Daddy even granted me demonic powers because Daddy loves me and I love Daddy back. {Dara and Kaila flash horns before Kaila mixes vodka with Diet Coke and tosses a bottle to Dara.) Dara - Thanks Kai. For now my amigos you can just show loyalty by printing 666 on your hand and putting pentagrams on your foreheads. This is a pentagram.

Cameraman - You can't show that! This is a christian show and the catholics will get us shut down! Besides I still have well over twelve payments t make on my Victoria's Secret credit card. The interest is murder but those garter sets sure make me look cute.

Kaila - Is there a test tomorrow? Then why are you trying to make me sick? {Kaila's eyes roll back in her head as she takes a huge sip of Diet Coke mixed with vodka and begins to hammer nails through a baseball bat.}

Cameraman - Don't say that. I hope to be a preaching trannie who brings the word of the lord to all my beautiful sisters. {Kaila's eyes flash rage as she grips the baseball bat and walks toward the cameraman while Dara puts her finger down her throat and pukes her insides up at what the cameraman just said.}

Kaila - Is there a gas leak in here? Then shut it!

Cameraman - I'm trying to speak. You must die … {Kaila then just loses it as she swings the bat at the cameraman's legs before she hammers the bat repeatedly at the cameraman's chest and head while blood gushes everywhere. Kaila then hammers the bat repeatedly at the corpses throat before the head falls off and she tosses the head to Dara.}

Dara - You must die … yea that's what she came for. {Dara then pours slabs of sour cream and cheese sauce on the head before she devours it ravenously.} Dara - Mmmmmm … thanks Kai. There's nothing like fresh brains in the morning. {Kaila grins as she takes anther sip of Diet Coke and bites down on one of the cameraman's fingers that she dipped in ranch sauce.}

Kaila - Not bad … just wish he wasn't allergic to soap and water. What's our mission for today?

{Dara's eyes roll back in her head and she leans back against a tree and finishes a bottle of Diet Coke and begins another.} Dara - Our what? Oh … our mission … We're supposed to help Jakara GAIN REVENGE on those who murdered her. Speaking of which … where is Jakara?

{Kaila sips Diet Coke as leans next to Dara and grins as her eyes roll in her head and she stares forward.} Kaila - Yea Jakara come out … I'm too fuckin wasted to play where's Jakara.

{Jakara floats out from behind a rock holding three Uzis with a duffel bag looks at Dara and Kaila sipping Diet Coke.}

Jakara - How dare you start the after party without me! I thought it was at Bella's place. Sakura told me to bring this. {Jakara shows a big bag of white powder to Dara and Kaila and Dara's eyes bulge wide as Kaila wraps her hands around Dara's waist.}

Dara - Please Kai … just one sniff {Dara struggles to break free of Kaila's grip but is too wasted to do so.}

Kaila - Not until after the show Dara. We don't get paid unless we complete and I have a special surprise for you.

Dara - oh all right. I guess we can take a trip to Vegas after we recover from Bella's after party. Besides I got something special for you too … a heart shaped box of truffles that could have heroin and other goodies stuffed in them.

Kaila - Then fuck the Mapquest song! I heard those creeps are hanging by the bridge near Blue Lake Lock and load bytchiz cause we got work to do. Jakara … drive us there real slow so we can creep on those punks and get a good shot. C'mon let's sing!

C'mon vaminos! Get up … let's go! I don't care if you're fat and lazy! Get up! Let's get to it! I know that we will do it! Where are we going? To the bridge near Blue Lake! Why are we going? To kill these pinks! What are we going to do? Kill those punks! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Kill all punks!

{Jakara stops the cart a few feet away from the bridge and Dara, Kaila and Jakara all get out as Dara hides under a bush and waves the others forward. Kaila takes out her infrared binoculars and shares the view with the others.}

Kaila - it looks like there's a bearded freak preaching to them but they're there all right.

Dara - Well that should make this simple … follow my lead on three. No survivors' bytchiz. {Dara holds up one finger then two before she leaps out from behind the bush and empties her Uzi on the punks as the others follow.}

Dara - Gangsta! Die you fatherfucking bitches die! Know your ass fry!

Kaila - Christ no preaching! Christ no preaching! Christ no preaching!

Jakara - Die all you bitches! Die!

{Three dead bodies lay on the ground and Jakara takes out a machete as she walks up to the last crawling one and yanks him up by the gold chain on his neck.} Jakara - Look at me! I said LOOK AT me! I want you to know that I did this to you! {the punk looks up before Jakara slices his head off with the machete and throws the gold necklace around her neck for a trophy. The others begin to search the dead as the ground is soaked in blood.}

Dara - That's how you handle punks who disrespect you kids. You can find other methods on my website. And you can even make money by doing this. Look I got 900 dollars and an I Pod!

Jakara - I got a gold necklace and 700 dollars! Plus I got revenge!

Kaila - I got over 40,000 dollars and a bible filled with crack! You should always check the missionaries' kids because they're the biggest conartists of them all!

We did it! We did it! We did it! Hooray! Lo jicimos! We did it! Dara came back as a zombie from the dead and Kaila killed the cameraman for preaching when he should have kept his mouth shut instead! We did it! Jakara came out from hiding with over a pound of caine and Kaila kept Dara focused till she gets stoned again! We did it! We crept on some losers and sent them to their doom! Jakara sliced a head off when he didn't die of gunshot wounds. We're going to go out and kill missionaries again real soon! We did it!

Dara - What was your favorite part of the show?

You - When Kaila killed the cameraman for preaching!

Dara - I liked that too! My favorite part was when I got to eat his brains. There's nothing like fresh blood in the morning.

Jakara - My favorite part was when I sliced its head off. and wore the gold necklace.

Kaila - My favorite part is going to be the after party where we'll all get stoned. Sai chien kiddies!

{Dara, Kaila and Jakara all wave to the camera as it cuts to the closing credits. The camera then shows Dara and Kaila standing in a library holding books.}

Dara - Hola amigos! We're in the library! A library is a great place to learn more stuff about interesting things.

Kaila - it's also a great place to ditch class because your teachers will never look for you there. Yuchun de jiaoshi! That's stupid teachers in Chinese. {Dara and Kaila laugh as Dara takes a sip of her shake.}

Dara - Today we talked about revenge and weapons and you can learn more about that in these books. A good starter book is this one. It's called How to Make Knives.

Kaila - Another good book is called Kill without Joy. Once you get past the title it's a really good read.

Dara - You can find more books like this at your local library.

Kaila - Just ask your friendly librarian and they will be happy to help you because

Dara and Kaila - The more you know the more you grow!

{The camera then cuts to the closing credits}


End file.
